7 Telling Signs That You Are In An Emotionally Abusive Relationship

Sometimes, in our effort to be extra nice and caring, we give too much of ourselves away. People around us generally fail at controlling dominance, and misuse the freedom we award them. It is a common occurrence in peer-groups to bully the weak one. Sometimes, even in romantic relationships, one partner takes the others choice for granted, leading to an elongated period of emotional abuse. In most cases, people do not realize that they are being abused, until it has caused irreparable damage.

We’re trying to look out for you, so here are 7 signs to look out for in any kind of relationship.

1. Your Conversations Are All One-Sided

If somebody really loves you, they will want to know more about your day. Sometimes, people just need a listening ear. They will ramble on about what goes on in their life, and hang up the phone as soon as their needs have been met. To them, you’re just a really pretty wall who doesn’t tire from listening to them go on and on about the same drama over and over again. An effective test to figure out whether they are interested in your life, is trying to figure out the difference in percentage of knowledge. You know everything about their friends, but they could hardly recollect anything more than just the names of yours.

2. They Don’t Trust You

In case you haven’t given them any particular reason to behave this way, then they’re only reflecting the kind of behavior they subconsciously think they deserve. If they’re dishonest, they will automatically think you are too. If they’re cheating on you, they will project that same persona onto you and doubt every one of your moves. Beware of one-sided trust relationships. There’s something majorly wrong.

Must read: Anxiety Disorders Are Linked To This Type Of Abuse

3. You Have Become The Scapegoat

They know how to turn the bullets around and towards you. Irrespective of what you say, they’ll find a way to put you in the hot seat. It’s always your fault, even though you can clearly see it isn’t. They will use your thoughts and words against you, and emotionally abuse their way into a clear conscience.

4. They Show A Lack Of Empathy

I find this trait highly disturbing in any human being. If you cannot feel deeply for your fellow human being, there’s something seriously wrong with you. When you’re confiding in somebody, you can tell if their reaction is superficial. Somebody who loves you will delve deep into the problem and try to honestly understand your pain instead of brushing it off like it’s not important.

5. They Don’t Say Things Straight

You will never get a yes/no answer out of them. “How are you?” “Well, not sure. We’ll see, maybe I’ll be alright.” This raises so many questions! The healthier answer would be: “No, I’m dealing with a tough situation.” or even “I don’t want to talk about it.” Emotional abusers will use your emotional investment to gain pleasure, while hurting you irreparably in the process.

Also, be careful if they avoid talking about more serious subjects with you.

6. They Don’t Honor Their Commitments

You can never take their word for anything. They’ll turn up an hour late for dates, will make you miss half the movie, cancel a plan last minute. Even on the abstract level, they’ll promise to work on a behavioral issue, without actually following through. So, these people are essentially a lot of talk but no results.

7. They Are Always Gone

Mostly when you need them. If they need to rant, they’ll call you and talk for over two hours. But when you need them, they’ll be short, uninterested, and probably absent. These are people who will never give you half the support you give them. Beware of the absentee friends who appear out of nowhere only to extract something from you.