First, let’s define the term ‘broken’.
Many times throughout your life you will meet people that, for some inexplicable reason, are not able to stay in a lasting relationship. They might be attractive, and they may possess the ability to feel love. In the long run, however, they mostly end up lonely, or in upsetting relationships. These are people you might call “broken.”
They are hurt and broken inside, making it difficult to love them. A great part of the time, they will be great partners for a date or two, but then escape from obligation or responsibility.
Most of the time, these people have pressing issues they need to confront and resolve before dating anyone. They may have outdated or incorrect notions about love, dating, or the opposite sex.
Broken people cause damage to their partner’s emotional and physical well-being, and they can be overall toxic people. They are people who have issues, pretty big ones, and that hurts the people around them. Deep inside, broken people are not happy people.
However, they may not comprehend that they are the reason they are always alone. Or, in case they know, they’ll refuse to believe it.
The good news is that you can improve yourself and truly end up being better, in case you are hurt and broken and find it difficult to love or be in a strong relationship.
If you can recognize these signs in yourself, please make sure to work on that for a better and happier self.
1. Every time you hear a love song or see a happy couple in love, you get jealous or angry
A lot of people have been there, and it’s a dreadful place to be. But this point shows how much negativity and pain you’re harboring inside. This suggests you need to truly change before you start dating anyone.
Must read: 20 Of The Most Powerful Secrets To Meaningful Relationships (#10 Is A Must)
2. Your expectations are unrealistic compared to what you have to offer
Not talking just for basic things like careers or behaviors here. Most people are usually very shallow and judgmental when it comes to choosing dates.
What we are trying to say here is that if you have lazy characteristics, no big goals and ambitions, don’t expect to end up with a CEO, even though you very much wish so.
3. Complaining that people only date “jerks”, or getting frustrated with some individual because they didn’t want to be romantically involved with you after you became friends with them
Chances are, you just might have a ‘Nice Guy’ complex, and it’s a big sign of both entitlement and a disregard for social etiquette. Romantic interest can’t be ignited. Forcing someone to like you will just irk the person, and make them think very little of you.
You might have gotten this conviction from risky rom-com films, so if you’ve been feeling cheated by the “Friend Zone,” you may need to explore healing your mind.
4. You pick your dates based on who others would like to see you with, rather than who makes you happy
This, while common, exhibits your own insecurity and over-eagerness to gratify others instead of your partner or yourself.
These relationships don’t last, which is why a chat with a therapist may reveal why you are so concerned with living according to others.
5. You’ve physically or emotionally abused your significant other, or mistreated them
Abuse is the fundamental sign that shows that you are too broken, making it difficult to date you. If your exes have regularly said that you’re aggressive or if they have restraining orders on you, it’s almost mandatory for you to look inside and discover what makes you hurt the people who care about you.
6. You don’t consider your partners as people
You don’t view them as individuals with their own feelings, wants, life, and aspirations. Broken individuals view the other sex as the foe or toys. Honestly ask yourself whether you see the other sex as dispensable and it’ll be a perfect chance to truly reconsider the way you approach courtship.
7. A lot of people have said you have inexcusable behavior, or have offered to find you help
If you hear it from just one ex, that may be gas-lighting. If you hear it from multiple exes, friends or family, then you may truly have an issue that you’re not acknowledging. You should consider going to therapy, before it’s too late.
8. Your family dictates your life
There’s nothing out of order with being close to your family. But, it’s not right when you let your family isolate you from any associates you have, block your avenues for growth as a person, or even picks who to see and hang out with.
If they do not allow you to manage your own relationship, that’s a problem. If you allow this, then they have a big chance of damaging you.
9. People tend to avoid you
Usually, there’s a harsh reason as to why people avoid you. You may need to inspect your social interactions to find the problem. Good thing is, you’re never too old to fix this, and identify issues in your behavior which you can then work on improving.
10. You push people away for the wrongs that others did
You probably know this is not the way to deal with things. You will feel more terrible as time goes on, and eventually, you’ll have to answer to the people you damaged.
Broken people break others. If you live by the sword, you’ll die by it too. If you find this happening, please avoid dating until you can fix this. It’s not safe for you or the people who date you.
11. Issues with vulnerability and obligation
You can’t have a relationship like that. Work out those specific issues before you consider dating another person.
12. People often say you refuse to take responsibility of your own issues, and to a point, you know it’s true
If you can’t accept your faults, you’ll end up blaming your partner for your misfortunes. If you want your next relationship to last, start accepting your faults and making your wrongs right.